Not Without My Daughter

Product Information

Betty met Moody’s entire family as soon as they came out, including his sister Ameh Bozorg, who had raised him. On the way home, Ameh Bozorg gave Betty a loose coat called a montoe and a scarf called a roosarie which Betty would need when heading out on the street at all times. Betty was confronted with a freshly slaughtered goat over which they needed to step over to re-enter the house. Her humanitarian work and efforts to pass bills to protect children's rights in the United States are commendable, and I'd never have known about them had it not been for this book. Though dated, it made me wonder if international child abduction is still as big a problem as it was in the 80s and 90s.

Here is a perplexing and frustrating film, which works with great skill to involve our emotions, while at the same time making moral and racial assertions that are deeply troubling. On one level, it tells a story that almost anyone can identify with - a mother deprived of her child and her freedom by the rigid rules of an unbending religion. On another level, it applies a harsh assortment of negative qualities to a group of people we may find ourselves at war with.Her book, Not Without My Daughter, is an account of her experiences in 1984–86, when she left Alpena, Michigan to go to Iran with her husband and daughter for what she was promised would be a short visit. Once there, she and her daughter were held against their wills. It was exactly what I thought - propaganda and war details, of which he had been obsessed with. It showed a man who seems to have been YELLING his view, speaking evil of Betty and acting as though all he wanted in life was to be with Mahtob. Moody spent a lot of time listening to Iranian radio and even withdrew his citizenship application. Betty began to consider divorce but didn’t quite know how she would maintain the living standard she had become accustomed to. That’s when she realized she was pregnant. Lost Without My Daughter suffers from its own version of classism. Where Not Without My Daughter seeks fault in Iran and Islam, Lost Without My Daughter does so in social status and affluence. Moody repeatedly claims he bought Betty expensive things to calm her temper and nerves. In the States, it was a lavish house, furniture, etc., and in Iran it was gold, Persian carpets, and other luxuries. One has to wonder why he never questioned the need to repeatedly calm her using material objects. Moody’s laziness also increased as Betty had expected it to. He no longer bothered to go on the school run with Betty. Khanum Shaheen noticed this and told Betty she could not allow her to use the phone or leave the building, but if she was ever late, they could overlook that.

Betty’s story culminated with a dramatic escape, as she takes her daughter from Iran over the Zagros Mountains and into Turkey. The book sold 12 million copies and inspired the 1991 Hollywood film of the same name, starring Oscar-winner Sally Field. For twenty years Betty’s husband has kept silent. Now, in Lost Without My Daughter, Sayed Mahmoody finally reveals the astonishing truth. The book was not so much about his family or his daughter as it was about the social and political aspects of the Iran/Iraqi war. Mahmoody argues against claims made by his wife, but then proceeds to gloss over his account of things, focusing instead primarily on his discussion of the war. Aga and Khanum Hakim asked Betty and Mahtob to attend English language Quran classes in an effort to have Betty see the beauty in Islam. They wanted her to convert but only of her own free will. They also encouraged Moody to allow Betty out more often. Betty started the recommended Quran classes and met another woman who was from Michigan. In 2003 I was going from Russia to my fiancée in Iran, planning marriage (well, we are successfully married till now). A night before my flight Russian Tv for some reason was showing “Not Without My Daughter”, that rather scandalous film about Betty Mahmoody and her and her daughter’s tragical story: for years she and her Iranian husband lived in USA and the minute they came to Iran to see his family, he turns into bloodthirsty monster, beats her and the girl, and so she has to escape through mountains of Turkey. Lies upon lies and lots of propaganda. Even though I saw the film before my first visit to Iran, I could smell that something is very wrong with it. Ah, did I mention, that the same night my every relative and friend called me to “warn” about Iranian horrors and May be to change my decision? I can agree that objectively, this book did make me wonder about people in the US being subjected to anti Iranian sentiments that might not be true.. Moody certainly didn't do himself any favors in how he authored this book.Another air raid at the market caused Betty and Mahtob to run home. The bombing coincided with the Friday prayer, and Baba Hajji had font to pray in the area that came under fire. When he didn’t return at his usual time, Ameh Bozog assumed he had been killed and began mourning. She began wailing and tearing at her hair. It was all for naught as he walked home in a few hours. He was covered in blood and flesh, but he was unharmed, albeit disappointed. He wanted to be a martyr like his brother. ALFRED MOLINA: (As Moody) I know it seems harsh but it's the best thing for all of us. Mahtob could learn real values here.

The next few days passed in a fog, but Betty had the presence of mind to count the cash she had left over from their shopping trips. She counted out almost a hundred dollars in American bills and the equivalent of two thousand dollars in Iranian riyals. She hid it under the mattress at night and on her person during the day. Mahtob’s birthday was nearing, and Betty insisted on having a party on the day instead of on a Friday as was customary in Iran. A few days before the party, Mahtob hurt herself and needed stitches, which had to be administered without anesthetic. This unfortunate incident intensified the need to ensure Mahtob had an excellent birthday party. This is a gripping, little-known follow-up to Betty Mahmoody's superb Not Without My Daughter. For those wondering what happened to Mahmoody and her daughter following their harrowing escape, the answers are here. Mahmoody described in great detail how they had to drastically change virtually every aspect of their lives after returning to the United States to ensure their future safety. Perhaps only those in a witness protection program can truly relate. The shopkeeper was called Hamid, and he offered to help Betty in an effort to prove Iranins are more helpful than what she had experienced. Betty had an interminable wait at the bakery for lavash and was terrified of Moody’s reaction. Moody bought the story but grew increasingly sullen and belligerent over the next few days.During their escape several people put themselves in harms way, possibly even in a position where they could be killed for helping Ms. Mahmoody and her daughter, but she doesn't express very much appreciation for it. She does, however, complain that every single household who helped them along the way served her "rancid" cheese that she couldn't even eat. Not all Iranians were shown in a negative light. There were some incredible kind-hearted individuals also, those who helped and befriended Betty in whatever way they could. Those parts made me cry. I think it’s quite short-sighted for anyone to delude themselves into thinking that she portrays all Iranians as bad people. She most certainly does not. She didn’t even portray Islam in a negatively. Yes, she has a problem with extremism and fanaticism and which reasonable-minded person wouldn’t? But the reader soon sees that it’s not Islam that she has a problem with, more so the way it was enforced in that oppressive regime. Betty spent an hour making calls home and gathering her wits before accepting her fate and heading home. She coached Mahtob to lie about their whereabouts and wondered at her daughter’s resilience at having to grow up so fast. Nothing could protect them from Moody, however. He banned Betty from ever leaving the house again.